Thoughts on flying

So I’ve been flying a lot the last few months and I have a few observations. Angie, my sister, warned me that I’d likely grow bored or tired of it after a while, and she was right. It isn’t that I dislike flying…but I dislike flying. I guess it beats the alternative of driving, but I kinda like driving; it’s that rare opportunity for a long period of time to just think and chill, things we don’t get to do much today (as a society, that is). And although it’s downhill to Florida, it’s a 14 hour drive there, but a 12 hour drive back.

I probably wouldn’t have been able to make some of these observations if I didn’t fly about once a week. One of the first things I started to notice is how big of a hurry people are to get on the plane. If the seats were unassigned and it was just seat as you board, that would make more sense to me. But on every single flight I’ve had, I’m assigned a seat. I get a seat. There’s no question whether I’ll get on or not. That’s why I don’t understand the rush, except of course, the case of those who sit in First Class as my sister often does. They get pampered from the minute they step foot on the plane. The rest of us (she calls us “losers”) have to sit and sweat until the plane pulls away. Additionally, the seats are often small and squish my knees.

So, I’m not really in a hurry to get on.

Takeoff has always been my favorite part of flying. I enjoy feeling the sheer power of the engines as they propel the plane along the runway. Once we’re in the air, I enjoy looking at the ground for a while, trying to pick out landmarks and highways and such. I mean, if the plane goes down, I need to know which way it is to walk back home.

The other observation I have, I wish I didn’t. I’ve become keenly aware of the sound of the plane engines. I’ve gotten to the point where I can generally tell when they’re giving it gas and when they’re laying off. What’s eerie is when they lay off for a few minutes and then suddenly rev it back up. I find myself quickly looking out the window to make sure we’re not headed down in a nosedive.

For a long while I kept hearing what I thought was the landing gear. Recently, though, I noticed the sound was actually the flaps on the wings. It makes a terrific winding noise as the flaps are put up or down.

The worst times, though, come in storms. I DO NOT like flying then. It gets bumpy (isn’t that an odd way to put it? Bumpy? In the AIR? How can air be bumpy?). You know it’s bad, however, when the flight attendant is telling you to fasten your seat belt and then screams “Oh God!” into the mic after a nasty bump.

I keep waiting for them to tell us “assume crash positions.” (cue Airplane movie clip)

Idoling

A couple of you will already know of Brittany’s (and mine cause she’s too young yet!) experience of auditioning for American Idol, but I figured it was such a cool experience that I’d write about it. Last year they opened up American Idol auditions to 15 year olds. As Brittany had already registered for Camp Electric (she had a blast and made many new friends!) and seeing that Camp Electric ended on the day before American Idol auditions, BJ and I decided that we’d stay the night and let her audition.

We’d heard all the horror stories (and read some of them online, too) about the long lines, so Brittany and I decided we’d get up really early and get down there to get as close to the front as we could. We even scouted out the location the day before (really, we had to get arm bands then, so we just scouted at the same time) so we’d know where to park and where to go for the line.

As a year and a half has now passed, I don’t remember the exact time, but I think we were up at 3 a.m. and out the door by 4. Supposedly AI wouldn’t let you line up before a certain time, but we wanted to be down there anyway. Parking was relatively easy…but we were surprised to see the line extend about three city blocks already. So, we fell in line, parked our hineys on the sidewalk and waited.

We were surrounded by interesting folks; some playing guitar, some listening to music, many of them singing, few of them with really good voices. Still, though, it was kinda cool. Once the line started moving, we learned they were just filtering us into the coliseum to take a seat. As we moved forward, we passed the line which had circled all the way around the block and crossed over and around to the other side.

We made our way in, took our seat, and waited again. Once everyone was in, an announcer told everyone how things would work and proceeded to fire up the audience for the film crew. Once the auditions started, I was super impressed at how quickly and smoothly they went. It was obvious the American Idol people have done that before and know what they’re doing. I don’t watch AI, but was still impressed with their organizational abilities.

In the center of the stadium was 12 tables separated only by curtains. Behind each table sat one or two judges. As the contestants filled onto the floor, they were put in a column of fours, very military style. They then lined 3 to 4 rows of four up in front of each table. The judges would call the entire row forward, speak to them, and then call them individually further forward for their opportunity to sing. After each of the four had their shot, the judges privately conferred and then called them forward as a group to announce their decision. Winners went one direction, others went the other direction. I sat for thirty full minutes before they selected the first winner.

Brittany didn’t place; one judge liked her, the other didn’t…and the decision had to be unanimous. Regardless, it was a good experience for her.

The 2nd Spring Creative Writers Retreat

The Second annual Spring Creative Writers Retreat was held at the Hemingway-Pfeiffer Museum and Education Center in Piggott, Arkansas. Once again, I was honored to serve as the mentor/instructor. This marks my fifth year to be involved as a mentor/instructor. As always, it was an incredible experience.

Some have asked how I got involved with a Writers Retreat in farming country Arkansas. Well, I’ll tell ya! When I moved to Piggott to become editor of the then Piggott Times, I worked hard to get to know the people I didn’t already know. Keep in mind, my family has been there for 150 years and has a long history there so I’m kin to about one-third of the folks there. I don’t remember exactly how it happened, but I know how I think it did: Deana Dismukes, who was then the Center’s administrator, had been delivering press releases to me. The summer of 2007, she asked me to come up and talk to the writers at the retreat. It was in the 5^th or 6^th year. She bribed me with lunch…and so I went. I did a story for the paper on the retreat and the writers there.

Then, in 2008, after I’d moved to Oxpatch, Deana asked me to come be the assistant mentor for the week long summer session. It seemed the mentor who’d help get it all started, Dr. Rob Lamm, had responsibilities elsewhere and his assistant was stepping up. I gladly accepted!

The retreats were so popular with the writers they demanded a Fall version. Thus, that November, a three-day Fall retreat saw its inaugural session with me as the only mentor. The others had regularly scheduled school responsibilities and I was available! The next year, 2009, the Fall retreat expanded to a weeklong event. Last year, 2011, writers demanded a Spring retreat. It was—and still is—a three day event. I’m honored to have been the only mentor at all of the Fall and Spring Retreats, and I love to see the continual flow of new writers coming to get some of Hemingway’s ambiance (he wrote parts of Farewell to Arms in the barn studio there on the grounds).

Generally, I give the writers a mini-lecture followed by writing exercises both in the morning and then after lunch. Many of them come with projects they’re working on (like novels) and just want some time to get away and write! I know of about three novels that have been at least partially finished—or at least worked on—while at the retreat.

This year was no exception with a slightly smaller—but no less talented group. Pictured are: front (l-r) Dr. Adam Long – Associate Director for the Museum and Ed. Center, me, Mary Lou Moran; back (l-r), John Achor, Shannon Richards, Linda Wyss, Jane Gatewood, Jerry Davis. Not pictured are Anne Winchester and Brett Thielemier.

If you’ve ever considered a retreat, let me encourage you to consider the Creative Writers Retreats at the Hemingway-Pfeiffer Museum and Education Center. I don’t think you’ll regret it. Tell’em Roland sent ya!